Why go far when I am near you...

Sunday morning,our family is going to attend the Sunday mass in UP Campus. While everyone is ready, our car didn't start. Kahit anong gawin namin, hindi talaga mag start. My family has to wait. Pero nakita namin na maraming tao sa function hall. Our place is in a compound called Spazio Bernardo in Sauyo. Yon pala may naka-schedule na Sunday mass at 10:00 am. Dahil sa ayaw mag-start ang sasakyan namin, we decided to attend the mass at the Function Area.

(This is our place in Quezon City - Spazio Bernardo in Sauyo Q.C.)



Today is the first Sunday of Advent and we found out na consecration din pala ng Patroness ng SB, the Our Lady of Fatima. The compound will have its patroness saint from today.

After the mass, the car mechanics arrived and naayos yong sasakyan namin. Then i realized that maybe Mama Mary didn't want us to go far. She would like us to attend her consecration sa place namin.



All of us offered flowers and prayers.

I arrived at NAIA earlier than the scheduled time. Supposedly 4:30 pm ang arrival namin pero napaaga kasi na cancelled yong stop over sa Bangkok dahil sa gulo sa Airport.

My Smart roaming was not activated yet kaya yong Jawal phone ko na lang ang ginamit upon my arrival para tumagal sa sundo ko. Exactly 2:30 lumapag yong eroplano namin. When i called my sister, paalis pa lang daw sila sa bahay. So i have to wait.I was the one who go outside the plane pero an tagal ng bagahe ko sa conveyor kaya natagalan ang paglabas ko ng airport.

It was after an hour bago ko nakuha ang amit ko, so i hurriedly went out the Terminal 1 assuming na andoon na rin yong sundo ko, but my sister texted me na na traffic sila and it will take them an hour more.

Sobrang init sa labas ng airport.

After an hour, it was 5:15pm, my family arrived and i was so excited to see all of them na sumundo sa akin.


Since kompleto naman yong family ko, we decided to dine in Mall of Asia near the shore para makita yong sunset.

After we dine, we went to Mall of Asia para mamasyal. Di ko naramdaman yong pagod at antok dahil nga sa excited ako na makasama yong family ko.

Before we went home, dumaan muna kami sa Trinoma para mag grocery.

Stop-over in Kuwait

Sam take me to the airport at 4:30 pm. Although kagagaling lang niya sa work, pero pinilit niya na maihatid ako.



We arrived 5:30pm at King Khaled Airport. 7:00pm ang flight ko, so i have to check in the luggages. After i checked in the luggages, Sam left at around 6:30pm.

I checked in around 6:45 pm at lumipat yong eroplano exactly 7:00pm We arrived in Kuwait at exactly 7:56 pm.

It took me 4 hours to wait inside the airport bago mag connecting flight papuntang Manila.

READY TO GO...

All my bags are packed
I'm ready to go....



Mabibilang ko na lang ang oras at malapit ko nang makita ang family ko. Medyo excited na ako and everything is ready.

This morning I chat with my sister and i asked her to cook for me Pork Adobo para pagdating ko, iyon ang una kong titikman.

Actually, talagang pinipit ko yong boss ko na makauwi na ako kahit hindi pa dumating yong kapalit ko sa office. My boss asked me (again) to delay more days dahil wala nang gagawa ng trabaho ko sa ofifce. Hindi na ako pumayag kasi sobra na masyado yong extension ko. Besides, ang hirap na nang booking for the next days at baka matagal pa bago ako makakuha ng booking.

Anyway, he signed my clearance and i got my passport and ticket already kaya wala tuloy na tuloy na ang uwi ko sa Pinas.

Hayyy.. sa wakas i can be with my family and friends soon.


So I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when i'll be back again...

MAASALAMA SURPRISE!

It was a busy day for me since I had to visit Doc Delfin in Al Rahji Clinic for my dental check-up before doing a last-minute shopping in Batha Wednesday night.

Bandang hapon while i visited Tita Evelyn in Asasco Compound, my officemate called me kasi may naghahanap daw sa akin. I hurriedly went home at pagdating ko, may nakahanda na silang Maasalama (Despidida) para sa akin.

I was not expecting that my officemates had to prepare something for me as a despidida for my vacation.

Although wala talaga akong plano, pero dahil na rin sa sila mismo ang nag initiate, i appreciate their effort para sa pag alis ko.

To Jong, Melan, Renard, James, Glojess, Dave and Onyo.. thanks for the treat.

IN OUR JOURNEY OF LIFE

I was once told, that if ever I needed strength, look to the Lord
If ever I needed bread, look to the Lord.
If ever I need a friend, look to the Lord.
I found all the answers by looking to the Lord.

In our journey in life, the word of God is our map and the Holy Spirit is our compass. And when we face battles, let HIS word be our sword and let HIS love be our armor.

It doesn't matter whether or not we have won the race, as long as in our heart, we know we have done our best. Tough times don't last. Tough people do.

I am always so thankful for everything I have. Sometimes it doesn't seem like enough, but I am grateful for it because I know I may not have everything I desire but I get what I deserve.. a loving family who gives me strength.. friends whom I can lean on.. a healthy life…and career that can sustain my living.

CHICKEN SOUP OF THE DAY

No distance of PLACE or lapse of TIME can lessen the FRIENDSHIP of those who are thoroughly pesuaded of each other's WORTH.

Why I Blog?

“Maalaala Mo Kaya” is without any doubt the best Drama series I've ever seen because the stories are extremely touching. The reason for that might be the fact that every episode of the TV show is based on a true Filipino story. And because those stories reflect life itself they really touch the soul and heart of the viewer.

Last Saturday night, I was watching the episode of a dying mother with breast cancer who took the risk of getting pregnant despite of her illness. Kailangan niyang mamili between her life and the child in her womb kung sino ang ililigtas.

Her son, seeing how her mother suffers, was very much affected lalo na sa studies niya. The teacher told the mother na may gustong sabihin ang bata pero wala siyang mapag sabihan, not even his parents. According to the teacher, her son needs an outlet para mailabas ang gusto niyang sabihin. Then the teacher advised the mother to give him a diary na kung saan pwede niyang isulat ang gusto niyang sabihin, which her son did.

In this story, it is also the reason why i express myself thru blogging.

In our lives, meron din tayong mga emotional baggages o di kaya may mga pagkakataon na gusto nating ilabas ang nararamdaman natin but nobody dare to listen. O di naman pagnasabi na natin, deadma lang. Blog is like an open diary.

Actually this is my second blog. my first blog, which was already blocked in the Kingdom due to some illicit contents, has been recognized and nominated several times for best blog.

Blog is the simplest kind of open letter para kahit papaano, some can understand, listen and be compassionate. Of course, very entertaining din ang magbasa ng tungkol sa buhay ng iba especially if we can relate to some instances sa buhay nila.

Sa akin, it is also one way of releasing my emotions and what I want to share, kasi nga I am a silent type at hindi ako mahilig mag share ng buhay ko verbally sa ibang tao, except the people I trust. Thru the blog, I am talking to people discreetly, and expect that some of them will listen. Others may find my blog uninteresting, pero at least nailalabas ko kung ano ang nasasaloobin mo. I’m here not only to entertain, but to reach out and educate. Of course with some limitations dahil I still want my privacy to be respected. Ang puwede ko lang i-share ay yong mga real life experiences ko (best and lesson-learned), and my perceptions of what life must be.

FRIENDS I MISSED...

I downloaded a movie called "Mga Babae Sa Isla Azul" and watched it last night. It was released in 1997 featuring Ynez Veneracion, Isko Moreno and introducing my friend, Dave Montelibano.

A group of "Promos", models and a photographer who stay on an isolated island, do fashion shoots in the day, make-out at night and at the MIDDLE of the movie, encounter the bad guys (Loose criminals hiding out in this island)

Nauso before ang mga titillating movies kaya kahit walang kuwentang story at low-budget, may mga gumagawa ng ganitong klaseng pelikula. Actually, tawag nila pito-pito films, kasi nga it took seven days para gumawa ng isang pelikula. Lousy plot, lousy acting, lousy direction, lousy art direction... this film failed miserably at entertaining me intellectually! At best its probably funny watched drunk or stoned: Patrick dela Rosa as a fashion model, Isko Moreno as a Director in Speedos the whole time and Dave, who acted as the cameraman.

It was the first time that my friend Dave (Jeffrey in real life) appeared in a movie. Medyo nakakabitin nga daw yong shooting dahil madalian daw yong pelikula na yon dahil konti lang ang budget at maiksi lang yong role niya sa pelikula. That was the year ng kasikatan niya, where he worked as GRO sa isang club.. He got the looks. Minsan nga palagi siyang napagkakamalan na si John Lloyd Cruz. Hindi tulad ng iba, Dave tried to manage his finances at sinikap niyang mag-aral. Now, may sarili na siyang negosyo.


Dave is a very kind person and a nice friend. Kaya naman when I called him na pauwi na ako, he was excited and we plan everything na gagawin namin, together with my other friends, this holiday season. Actually, i–set aside niya na lang daw muna yong business niya para samahan niya akong mamasyal. Honestly, may hinihingi siyang pasalubong sa akin na hindi ko maibigay este maisama pauwi, kaya babawi na lang ako sa quality time na puwede kong ibigay sa kanya once na magkita kami.

Of course I will spend most of my time with my family. Uunahin ko muna ang family ko and make sure that everything will be fine, after that, I’ll try to manage to meet my close friends dahil tagal na rin naming di nagkita-kita and hopefully, I can accommodate all of them especially yong mga classmates ko (since it is our 20th anniversary), brothers in fraternity, my co-blogger Richard of Paluan, some of our SE talents, and my special friend whom I will surprise on his birthday and many more.

ROAD NOT TAKEN

I still remember my English teacher in high school told us to interpret and memorize Robert Frost’s “Road Not Taken” na hanggang ngayon mas memorize ko pa kaysa sa famous “Trees” ni Joyce Kilmer.

At that time, we interpreted the “yellow wood” literally as a forest.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth . . .

Until now, the poem still struck me, but I realized and referred the “yellow wood” in his poem as the autumn of our lives! Yong panahon na kailangan mong mag desisyon sa buhay given 2 choices. What a different insight that gave me, in contrast to the first time we interpret the poem

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same


Now it speaks to me of coming to that point in the autumn of our lives when we stop and decide whether to break from the path we have been taking:


Sometimes we stand at a fork in the road and there is no turning back

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back..

As more and more of us enter into the autumn of our lives, my hope is that we will muster up the courage to take the road less traveled and share Robert Frost’s deep sense of satisfaction in knowing that the new path was the right path:

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

BILLY'S HOLLYWOOD SCREEN KISS: Figuring out what you really want...

Coming out and figuring out what and who you really want


Billy, a struggling young gay photographer (who likes Polaroids), tired of being the "other man", falls in love with Gabriel, a waiter and aspiring musician who is probably straight but possibly gay or at least curious. Billy tries to get Gabriel to model for his latest project, a series of remakes of famous Hollywood screen kisses, featuring male couples, while also trying to win his affections.

Entranced by Gabriel, Billy takes him on as a model and introduces him at gallery openings and parties, only to see Gabriel leave for better modeling assignments with well-known fashion photographer Rex Webster (Paul Bartel).

Gabriel gets the underwear modeling job and goes to Catalina. Billy follows after him to Catalina with Georgiana (who, on the rebound from her boyfriend Andrew, hooks up with drug-addled island resident "Gundy"). Billy crashes Rex Webster's underwear shoot looking for Gabriel but does not find him.



Billy eventually tracks Gabriel down at Rex's party later that night and the two talk on the beach. Billy relates to Gabriel how confused he was when he came out, saying, "I swore to myself that if I could ever be there for somebody, I would, so that that person wouldn't have to go through all the shit I went through. What I'm trying to say is, if you're having problems figuring out where you stand, even if you're not sure of what you're supposed to want—"; however, before Billy can finish, one of Gabriel's fellow models comes up. Billy realizes that the two of them are together and Gabriel tells him straightforwardly, "Billy, I'm pretty sure what I'm supposed to want." Gabriel tries to soften the blow, but Billy rebuffs him. Billy feels hurt and even wonders if Gabriel used him to get his modeling career off the ground.

"Never give up when everything fall into pieces.
Never even lose hope when everybody turns their back on you.
Remember that life is not about being fair, it's about surpassing the unfair reality."

Need a copy of Billy's DVD? write a comment in this blog.

Ratings: 4 stars

DINNER IN TONY ROMAS

Wednesday night, I rushed to Asasco Compound to get the perfume from Tita Evelyn. Although I need to be backhome, pero Tita asked me to stay.

She gave me S.T. Dupont perfumery set which she bought from Debenhams. I like the smell than my favorite Bulgari Blue. Knowing her, she really considered me a good friend. Actually I made a video clips of her Spa center which she liked it so much kaya naman sobrang thankful siya at nasunod yong gusto niya.

I waited for almost 3 hours dahil sa dami ng customer niya. After a while, she asked me to go with her to eat. It’s so timing that Doc Delfin called me up coz he was just nearby. We asked him to join us in Tony Romas in Olaya.

We arrived in Tony Romas. I showed to Doc the perfumery set that Tita gave me. He told me that ST Dupont is one of the most expensive perfume in the world and again I thank Tita for giving it to me.


Rani arrived later from a previous dinner appointment and joined us in the dinner.

We ordered scampy shrimp pasta, rib eye, caesar’s salad.

CHICKEN SOUP OF THE DAY

Be the reason for someone's happiness, not just a part of it.
Be a part of someone's sadness, but not the reason for it.

LIFE IS A GREAT LONG TRIP

Everytime I write, I don’t pretend to be a poetic wordsmith. I just want to express myself freely sa kung ano ako at sino ako. Moreover, I am here not only to entertain but to convey my experiences, at least, to educate and hoping that the readers can get lessons from what I want to share.

Madalas nasasabi ko sa pagsusulat lahat ng gusto kong sabihin…. sa kaibigan… sa blog…sa diary….at kahit sa friendster. Siguro, kung nagiging touchy or maybe sappy to others ang mga sinusulat ko, I don’t mind. I owe it to my experiences and to the people who taught me how to be expressive. Lalo na pag pinatibay ka ng mga problema at circumstances na dumaraan sa buhay mo.

Anyway, The lips know only shallow tunes. Kung minsan, deceiving pag magaling sa rhetorics ang isang tao…yong tipong marunong mag disguise, mapaniwala ang iba at magpaikot ng tao… but the heart is where great symphonies are born which can be conveyed thru writing and honestly, my heart dictates what I write.

Siguro natuto akong mas naging poignant writer kaysa maging verbal conversationalist when I was privileged to meet multi-awarded personalities like Chito Rono, Tony Mabesa, Alex Cortez and Ricky Lee when I was in college. Naging facilitators namin sila sa isang national Theater and Scriptwriting workshop during my college days. At doon nagsimula ang interest ko sa pagsulat….in which kung sinunod ko yong passion ko, malamang wala ako dito sa Saudi.


Habang papalapit ang araw ng pag-alis ko, pabagal ng pabagal ang oras na hinihintay ko. Sa mga pinagdaanan kong roller-coaster life ride for the past weeks… with all the anxieties, sleepless nights, bad health condition, etc., I’m starting to feel the inconvenience of spending more days waiting for my scheduled trip back home. Parang ang bagal….

Obviously, there are many changes that a human being goes through in the short span of time. Kadalasang dahilan ang pressure and stress, which may lead you to complexity of life but sometimes we can also see happiness and all other form of emotions that are designed to lift us up because we have to see our life to be worthy because of the supports of your friends. Kahit paano hindi tayo dapat magpadala sa problema.

Some people always want the emotions that lift us up, to be on a high for their whole life. But you cannot have life without the low. Low and high go hand in hand; they never walk alone. Kailangan balansehin ang magkakasalungat na bagay mag-isa o sa tulong ng iba.

One thing we can do to others to help the low is to be there and walk hand in hand with the person experiencing that low; maybe two steps in front of them, to clear the way, but at the same time one step behind, to catch them if they fall. Ganon lagi.. tulungan dahil minsan darating din sa buhay mo ang pangangailangan mo ng karamay.

I think of life as a great road trip. Yong tipong walang tigil na byahe na hindi mo alam kung saan ka tutungo lalo na kung maraming sanga-sangang daan. And if you spend too much time looking back at where you've been, you'll miss what's ahead, kaya nga we have to leave all “nightmares” behind and look forward which road shall we take when we get into the crossroads sa tulong ni God…ng ating pamilya… at ng mga tunay na kaibigan.

Anyway, I always feel thankful, and be thankful, for everything that I experienced in my life. Although sometimes it doesn't seem like enough, but I am grateful for it. Ika nga, pasalamat ka sa lahat ng bagay na nangyayari sa buhay mo because sometimes, doon mo makikita ang mali sa tama, kung sino ang mahina sa matibay at makikila mo nang husto ang mga tao sa paligid mo.

And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years, the way you are real and kind to others, even if they don’t. Only a life in the service of others is worth living.


In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: "It goes on."

FRIENDSTER is hacked!

Last Friday, after chatting with my family in the Philippines, I opened my Friendster account but I can’t access and the page showed it was under maintenance. I waited for several hours since oftentimes, Friendster resumed its site after few hours. Disappointedly, it was midnight already but the site was still unavailable. Medyo kakaiba from the usual na maintenance na ginagawa nila. I thought my account was hacked so I called up my friend, sinabi sa akin na wala talagang friendster.

Saturday, when I logged in on my Friendster account, lo and behold, my friends were down to 10! I panicked! According to Friendster, it was just a power failure that caused the errors in their databases. No need to worry about missing friends and access problems because they were doing their part to resolve the issue in the next 24 hours.

However, a lot of Friendster fanatics were already pissed off and disappointed. Today, my friends told me it was back to normal, but it has been six days and i still have not recovered some of my friends. I found out that a hacker named h4xOrnytmare infiltrated their database.

CHICKEN SOUP OF THE DAY

The ultimate measure of a person is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge.
The difficulties are intended for us to become better not bitter.

SPECIAL GIFT

Having someone to remember is pleasing enough to the heart, it doesn’t matter kung naaalala ka nila once in a while, what matters is, they are with you all the times pag kailangan mo sila. Kaya just a week before I go on vacation, in my own little way, I was able to prepare special gift to special people for them to remember me on Christmas holidays during my absence.

Unlike in my previous years where we spent Christmas and New year together, this time I will surely miss the fun and our exchange of greetings during Christmas and New Year.

Usually, I celebrate the season, kasama ang grupo, in Cetro’s residence (a family we consider to be the one of the best in Riyadh). Bigayan ng regalo, kuwentuhan, at hindi mawawala ang masarap na kainan. Although the celebration time is always limited at hindi puwedeng mag ingay ng husto dahil nga sa bawal dito sa Saudi Arabia, masaya pa ring lumipas ang okasyon na lahat masaya.

When I first arrived in Saudi, it was October, nanibago ako sa unang pasko ko dito. Actually, we didn’t have any celebration at all dahil that time, may pasok sa office namin. Our office time ended at 7:30pm which is 12:30 ng umaga sa Pilipinas. Kaya naman 6:00pm pa lang, kanya-kanya na kaming diskarte para lang mabati ang aming mga loved ones sa Pinas. Yong iba, nag off ng maaga para makapila na sa call cabin dahil wala pang cellphone noon. Yong iba naman nakikisuyo sa company telephone operator tapos ide-deduct na lang sa sahod yong bill. Ang hirap tumawag sa Pinas that time. It cost you 8.5SR/minute ( almost 100.00 pesos)

At pagdating ng uwian, kain ng dinner sa Mess Hall… … konting kuwentuhan, batian at tuloy na sa kanilang quarters para matulog, nagkataon kasi it was the holy month of Ramadan. Ang higpit ng mga military police at pag may narinig na ingay, papasukin nila at huhulihin lahat. There were many instances that after Christmas, ang dami naming nabalitaan na hinuli at ikinulong.

Pero recently, medyo hindi na sila mahigpit.

Going back to my special gift, actually it was my own choices. I prepared special MP3 music that can be appreciated and shall remember me when they listen to these selected songs.

First, a compilation of a hundred Tagalog Christmas songs.
Second, Sitti’s Bossanova music which I considered to be great for car stereo and during sleep time.
I also include Christian Bautista ballad songs/live concert and Charice Pempenco’s album.

What I like most is the Scholars sing Cayabyab album especially Van Pojas's (not Roxas) "Another Goodbye Song" and Laarni's "Manalig Ka".
To add more, I include soundtrack of The High School Musical 3.

I started searching for these albums since September and just in time before I left, everything had been done.

I hope I can touch someone else’s heart thru these songs and they can feel my own way of expressing my gratitude for a wonderful year I’ve spent with them.

I was expecting that I can only bring with me a hand-carry bag for my stuff sa pag uwi ko. Hassle kasi pag may check-in luggage. I hate waiting pa naman sa conveyor sa airport. However, dahil na rin sa mga bigay na pasalubong from my friends (and I expect more to come), kahit mag excess baggage ako, okey lang. Beside, dahil nga sa kulang ako sa budget, nakakadagdag na rin ang mga ito, and I thank you guys.

To Johhnie and Matet for the bunch of Galaxy chocolates.

To Tita Edith for more chocolates and cash.

To Tita Evelyn (who called me up @ 2am just to let me know na may ibibigay siya sa aking bonggang-bongga) for the imported perfumery set (S.T. Dupont Paris binili pa daw niya sa Debenhams!), which according to Doc Delfin is one of the most expensive perfume. Pero humirit pa rin ako ng favorite kong Bulgari Blue..he.he.he.he.. which she promised to give me soon.

To Manoy Joel, although hindi ko pa natatanggap yong Celio na promise niya, thanks in advance.

To my Syrian friend, Ezmat, for the gift.

To my ever-so-kind boss, who handed-over to me “special gift” for my family.

Sana marami pang magbigay..he.he.he.he.he..Ang bait talaga ni Lord alam niya na kailangan ko ang mga ito dahil sa problema ko...

Likewise, let me thank also my ever-generous friends.

Of course to Rani , available 24 hours for anything I need.

To Doctor Delfin for giving me a new look and a reason to have a smile-that-fits-across-my-face.

To Mommy and Daddy Quiambao for the advice.

Of course, to my dear good friend, Sam… thanks for everything you’ve done everytime I need a friend.

And to all of you who wish me luck on my coming vacation.

Promise, dadalhan ko kayo pagbalik ko ng boy bawang or dingdong..he.he.he.he.

Chicken Soup for Today

Emotional stress greatly affects our lives.
It's always lethargic and everyone's vulnerable.
Always have your emotions in constant check.
Reconcile misunderstandings.
Free your mind from cluttered emotions.
Know the problems and make solutions.
Never leave space for doubtful feelings.
A light heart is more efficient in work and to other things.

BUTIL

In life, there are times that you have to face tough decisions, either you make it or break it.
But do remember whichever way you go, there are NO wrong decisions in life, it's for you to make it right.

In a far-flung place, a God-fairy, in disguise of an old poor woman, was stuck up in a mud habang buhat-buhat sa kanyang likuran ang isang malaking plastic bag. Pepe, who happens to be in her behind rushing just to catch the last trip of the bus going back to Manila, saw how the old woman tries to pull her leg out from the mud. Hindi matiis ni Pepe na makitang nahihirapan ang matanda kaya kanya itong tinulungan kahit alam niya na maiiwan siya ng bus. Makalipas ang ilang minuto, naalis ang pagkalubog ng binti ng matanda at laking pasasalamat niya kay Pepe.

Bilang kabayaran, the old woman gave Pepe one seemingly rare seed. " Kunin mo ito at itanim mo sa isang paso", said the old woman.

Pepe, still puzzled why he was given the seed, open his arm and received the seed from the old woman.

" Alagaan mo at patubuin iyan sa labas ng iyong bakuran… Diligan mo araw-araw ng mainit na tubig..Pag lumabas na ang mga dahon, ipasok mo sa loob ng bahay sa umaga at ilalabas mo lang sa iyong bakuran sa gabi. HUWAG na HUWAG hahawakan ng sinuman ang dahon nito at huwag pipitasin kung ito'y mamumulaklak dahil WALANG KATIYAKAN kong ito'y mabubuhay pa rin o tuluyang mawawala sa iyo"

Pepe, still wondering what the seed will do in his life, walks away taking the seed in his hand.

When he reached his house, he immediately plant the seed in a pot with a nourishing sands. Then, inilabas niya ito dahil gabi na...

Kinabukasan, laking gulat niya ng makita ang halamang tumubo ng halos isang talampakan ang haba. Malusog ang mga dahon nitong kulay luntian at ang tangkay nito ay sinlaki na ng kanyang hintuturo sa kamay. Sadyang kaakit-akit ang mga kislap ng dahon dahil sa sinag ng araw. Agad-agad niya itong ipinasok sa bahay at diniligan. Naalala niya ang bilin ng matanda na pag hinawakan niya ang anumang parte nito, walang katiyakan kong ito ba ay mabubuhay o mamamatay.

Halos araw-araw niyang inalagaan ang halaman hanggang sa mamulaklak ito. Laking gulat ni Pepe sa nakita niya isang umaga. Kakaibang bulaklak na ngayong lang niya nakita sa buong buhay. Hugis daliri ng isang dalaga ang petals nito at sa gitna ay tila mga butil ng perlas na nagkikislapan. Natukso siya at muntik na niyang mahawakan pero biglang sumagi sa isipan niya ang sinabi ng matanda… Napilitan siyang tingnan na lang ang bulaklak habang ipinapasok niya ito sa loob.

Tuwing gabi, gaya ng bilin ng matanda, inilalabas niya ito at hindi maiwasan mapansin ng kanyang mga kapitbahay ang kakaibang halamang iyon..

Isang gabi, habang nasa labas ang halaman, nakarinig si Pepe ng kaluskos malapit doon sa kung saan niya nilagay ang halaman.. Dali dali siyang lumabas at nakita niya ang isang estranghero na hawak-hawak ang bulaklak. Laking gulat niya at sinigawan ang estranghero at mabilis itong tumakbo papalayo…

Labis ang pag-alala ni Pepe na baka mamatay ang bulaklak dahil sa nahawakan ito ng tao. Halos gabi-gabi nyang binabantayan ito at napansin niya na sa halip na mamatay ang bulaklak, patuloy itong yumayabong at kumikislap lalo na ang petals ng bulaklak.

Isang umaga, pag gising niya laking gulat niya ng may nakita siyang sugat sa kanyang katawan. Isang sugat na hindi niya alam kung ano ang nangyari. Kanyang pinasuri sa isang doctor at doon niya nalaman walang gamot sa sugat niya. Alalang-alala siya habang naghahanap ng lunas para magamot ang sugat pero bigo siya.

Sa kanyang panaginip, biglang nagpakita sa kanya ang matandang nagbigay ng halaman. Sinabi nito na tanging ang mga tila butil ng perlas sa halaman ang siyang mabisang gamot sa kanyang sugat. Tinanong niya ang matanda kung paano niya gagawin dahil hindi puwdeng hawakan ang halaman dahil walang katiyakan kung ito'y mabubuhay pa rin o tuluyang mawawala sa kanya. Walang sinagot ang matanda at bigla itong naglaho sa kanyang panaginip..

Napagdesisyunan nyang hawakan ang bulaklak na pinakaingat-ingatan nya. Inisip na lang nya na ginawa nya ito para sa sarili nyang kaligtasan. Para malunasan ang sugat na kanyang nararamadaman. Ito lang ang tanging paraan makapag patuloy sya sa buhay nya. Wala naman syang pangako na binitawan at walang kundisyon na dapat ingatan.

Unwinding in Al-Khobar

Al-Khobar is a 4-hour drive form Riyadh. Madalas tuwing Ramadan and HAJ vacation, dito ang puntahan ng mga taga Riyadh. There are places where you can unwind and feel the breeze of the Arabian Sea.



Puntahan ng mga tao ang dagat malapit sa coastway going to Bahrain, and if you want to go to the border, you can trek the 3 km bridge from Al-Khobar Sea shore hanggang sa dulo, which you have to pay 30SR per car.

FAMILY FIRST

One of the Filipino values that makes us different is our love for our family. Kadalasan, ang pamilya natin ang dahilan kung bakit tayo nagsusumikap para sa kapakanan nila. Minsan, we almost forgot that we have life of our own. We are bound to reciprocate whatever they have done to us. We are obliged to help our siblings sa kanilang studies.

Mahirap maging panganay dahil sa kanya puwedeng umasa ang gastos ng pag-aaral ng kanyang mga kapatid. Sometimes, we are burdened to take good care of our parents once they get old. Kahit may pamilya na, obligasyon pa rin ang tumulong sa pamilya.

Nakagisnan ko ang isang closely-knit family. For almost 20 years na sama-sama kami, I have seen how our parents sacrifice para makatapos kami. Sa apat naming magkakapatid, at bilang panganay na lalaki, I have to take care of my family kung wala ang father ko. Tuwing linggo, sama-sama kaming magsimba, mamasyal at tulong-tulong sa lahat ng gawain sa bahay.

Nang mamatay ang father ko, nangako ako na hindi ko pababayaan ang mother… financially at kahit nasa Saudi ako, I’ll make sure na pag umuwi ako, siya ang aking priority. Hindi naging madali sa akin ang asikasuhin ang pangangailangan ng mother ko because I also promised to my sister na ako rin ang sasagot sa gastos sa college (tuition and monthly allowances) ng niece ko. Of course, I need to sacrifice because I have an obligation na ipinangako sa kanila. Family first before my pleasure and happiness. I seldom spend for my own. Matipid ako dahil may pinaglalaanan. I stay most of the times sa bahay to avoid hefty spending dahil sa impulsive buyer ako.

Lahat ng ginagawa ko para sa kanila kahit may kanya-kanya na silang pamilya, still my concern is my mother and my sister’s family dahil mahihirapan din ang sister ko sa tuition ng mga anak niya sa college.

All the while, I thought everything is okey sa family ko despite the fact that I am here in Saudi Arabia. We never had any family problem before, kaya I was looking forward for a happy vacation especially this Christmas season dahil first time ko, for almost 10 years, to spend holidays with them.

However, isang matinding problema ang haharapin ko sa kanila, which started few weeks back. The problem is so sensitive that I need not to tell to anyone except my trusted friends. At first, I tried not to divulge to anyone about it, but it gave me sleepless night, emotional stress and worries which affects my health tremendously. All the while I could keep it to myself, pero hindi pala, I need people to boost my moral and give me strength dahil everytime I talk to my siblings, mas lalo akong affected dahil wala ako sa tabi nila. I suffer from HIVES (allergies) for almost a week. The doctor said that it was stress-related and histamines extract from my veins that cause the swelling and itchiness. This caused me to worry more. I keep on coming back to the hospital for an anti-allergy injections. There was a time that I went alone at 4:00 am at Al Mobarak Hospital amidst the rain and the weather outside.


First time kong ma-dextrose and stayed 7 hours sa hospital


Dahil nga sa bigat at seriousness ng problema ko na hindi ko pwedeng sabihin sa iba, some speculates at pinaghihinalaan nila about something na mas lalong dumagdag sa problema ko. I can’t blame them for the reason that I never confide my personal life to them. As much as possible I keep myself private… even my lovelife. Ang nakakalungkot lang, dahil sa gusto kong i-isolate ang sarili ko sa kanila para makapag-isip ako tungkol sa problema ko, kung ano-ano pang speculations ang naririnig ko. All I need are their prayers, consolation and understanding sa mga nangyayari ngayon, but only some dare to keep me hanging. Even to the point that I lost who I considered as my best trusted friends.. Hindi ko ginusto ang magkaroon ng problema, its just so happened na kailangan kong mag-isa, but needing someone whom I can lean on..pero lahat walang nangyari. They thought na mild lang ang problema ko or nagdra-drama lang ako, but God knows the load of my problem. Dito ko nasubukan kung sino talaga ang tunay kong kaibigan na pwedeng dumamay sa akin sa oras ng problema. Yong inaasahan mo na magbibigay ng support and encouragement, deadma despite na andoon ako pag may kailangan sila. It adds a little pain in my heart, pero siguro God want me to depend on Him at doon sa mga taong tumulong sa akin sa oras na kailangan ko sila. As they say, you can tell who your friends are if you can count how many knots they made on the rope in order for you not to fall.

The pendulum has not stopped from ticking. For me, every tick seems to be slower than the usual. Sa bawat minutong dumadaan, halos ang bagal para sa akin na hintayin ang araw ng aking pag-alis. I asked for early vacation pero hindi pumayag ang office naming since I have to end my contract until last week of November and my assistant delayed his vacation for more days in Pakistan because of the earthquake that ravage their village.

Until such time that I will be home, hindi pa rin ako mapakali at bothered ako lagi. I don’t know how to fix everything, pero I know, with God on my side, everything will be solved.

For me, I get my strength from my family. They are my life and happiness. Mas uunahin ko pa ang kapakanan nila kaysa sa akin. Kaya kung may problema sa family, I am the one much affected. I can sacrifice my own happiness for them. Mawala man lahat sa akin – my wealth, my friends and everything… wag lang makaranas ng problema at hirap ang pamilya ko..

To my friends who gave me comfort and strength.. I thank you.. God will reward your kindness in due time…

GAMITAN SA "PAUPAHAN"

Being treated as a commodity is a hurting truth we have to live by.

At first glance, you'll think "Paupahan" is another bold indie flick. The movie is set in slum area next to cemetery, made up of three unrelated but interwining stories of characters-all seemingly ‘living dead’-unfold in this anthology of lives of have-nots who have become commodities that are either for sale or for hire, in a most unlikely public cemetery just a stone’s throw from a squatter’s area( Kalye Sangandaan) in the city near the lake.

But as the story progresses, you are served with interesting stories of complex characters. Ang laos na callboy character ni Allen Dizon na pinasok ang pangbubugaw. The mother-daughter hate-and-love relationship of Snooky and Krista Ranillo. Ang busilak na pag-ibig ng isang matandang bading sa kanyang naging lover na inalagaan ang anak nito. Paghahayag ng gamitan issue sa mga third sex, at iba pa.

GLORIA( GLORIA ROMERO), is a caretaker of a rich family’s mausoleum, na may simpleng pangarap na gustong malibing pag namatay katabi ng puntod ng kanyang aswang si Donato who has long been dead.

DADENG ( GERMAN MORENO), Gloria’s gay neighbor who sells flowers for the dead in funeral parlor, is burdened by the child ( of a dead love-of-his-life) now a teen gay BYUTI ( KIRBY DE JESUS ), an incurable romantic who is head-over-heels in love with TOPHER ( JOSEPH BITANGCOL) ,a “user-friendly” bum, later revealed to be a closet “gay”. Dito ibinunyag ang GAMITAN ISSUE among gays. After everything have done, nag-hanap ng iba dahil sa matinding pangangailangan. Topher revealation of a NARCISSUS GUY, masyadong bilib sa sarili at ginagamit ang kanyang hitsura para mang akit ng “kapwa” niya bading. Dahil sa kanyang histura, ginamit niya ito para masunod ang luho, who turned out to be na ang gusto rin pala ay lalaki which admittedly, ay nangyayari sa totoong buhay. (Similar to the movie “Billy First Screen Kiss in Hollywood” na ang gusto pala ng prospect niya eh kapwa din niya model..he.he.he.he.he.. so common in Riyadh!)

Star ( KRISTA RANILLO ) ,is a trying-hard bit-player na nangangarap pumasok sa showbiz. She’d do anything for her ambition, kahit pumatol siya sa mga production staff just to get a role. Star has a ‘silent war’ with mother Lucinda ( SNOOKY SERNA), One common thing, though in this feuding mother-daughter tandem is their compulsion to work and earn. Lucinda brokers for neighbors who sell their kidneys and other vital parts for a fee. Ironically,she’s a chain-smoker who tries to survive despite her cancer-stricken lungs. While , Tonio Torres ( ALLEN DIZON ) ,is a male starlet-member of an all-male group called “Wild Boys”. Dahil sa tumanda na siya, nawala na rin ang amor niya sa mga matrona’t bading kaya pinasok niya ang pag bubugaw. Although matagal siyang naging callboy, he never go bottom. Pero kung kailan pa siya tumanda, saka pa niya naranasan sa isang mayamang bakla. For sure, you will shed tears because of the touching dialogues between Tonio and Star after Tonyo was sodomized.

ROBERTO SAN PEDRO( JAY MANALO ) ,an ex-convict, gets paroled by a powerful armed group who uses him as an assassin.A man of few words whose eyes reveal personal tragedies and utter bitterness ,he’s a reluctant hitman married to a nervous wreck, ANGELA SAN PEDRO ( ANGELU DE LEON), a good former public school teacher who has lost job after cracking due to extreme pressure.

Almost all of the above stories are resolved. Others are open-ended ‘coz that’s reality.

ALING LANDAS KAYA?

"May mga bagay na nagbago sa ating paglalakbay
Dating sigla at ligaya napawi ng lumbay
Tumayong nagiisa hinihintay ang wakas
Dito sa masukal na gubat.."

Hindi perpekto ang buhay kung puno ng saya’t tagumpay. Sadyang binigyan tayo ng pakiramdam para malaman natin ang kaibahan ng lungkot sa saya, gayundin ang pagkabigo sa tagumpay.

Kadalasan, ang sobra ay nagiging sanhi ng pagkakaiba ng agwat sa bawat paghahambing ng magkasalungat na bagay. Ika nga, perfection may lead to frustration.

The happiness that you get in your life may turn you upside down when you suddenly feel the burden of your problems once they come your way unexpectedly. Ang iba tawag nila dito ay ang malaking dagok sa buhay na pagnalampasan mo ay magbibigay sayo ng lakas para harapin ang anumang pagsubok sa buhay. Pero pag naging mahina ka at bigla kang sumuko, malamang ikapahahamak mo at tuluyan kang malugmok sa kalungkutan.

Ang pag harap sa suliranin ay kailangan mong mamili ng daan para masigurado mong may ilaw sa dulo nito. Minsan ang daan ay sanga-sanga, pero pag tama ang landas and the strength which you get from people who care and the support of the people who undestand you, madaling tukuyin kung anong landas ang iyong tatahakin.

Ang suliranin ay kayang suungin at lampasan baon ang mga panalangin at supporta ng mga taong nagmamahal na siyang maging tungkod sa lubak na daan o di kaya’y maging panangga sa unos na maaaring ikabagal ng pagtawid sa sangang-daan. Sa kabilang dako, kung mag-isa ka lang na tatawid sa daan baon ang FRUSTRATIONS, SAKIT NG KALOOBAN at KAWALAN NG PAG-ASA dahil sa hinubaran ka ng dignidad at respeto, magiging mabagal ang usad ng iyong mga paa upang pumili at tawirin ang alin man sa magkasangang daan.



"..Alam mong bawat pusong naglalakbay dumarating sa sangang-daan
kailangang magpasya…. aling landas ang susundin..
saan ka liligaya
saan mabibigo
saan ka tutungo..